Six lessons from mom that I use in missionary life
By Anna McShane —
As Mother’s Day approaches in the United States, we honor and thank each mom who raised a SEND missionary. God used you in amazing ways to equip your children to serve the Lord and to reach the lost! Here are six of my mom’s lessons that prepared me for life as a global worker.
1. There is always room at the table for more.
Hospitality was a way of life in my family of origin. Not entertaining. There’s a big difference. I learned very early how to stretch a meal if more people showed up than originally planned.
Individual pieces of meat can be diced, braised, and stretched with a white or brown sauce to serve over rice. A can of tomatoes or other vegetables will stretch soup. Add a loaf of bread, a bowl of cut fruit, a salad, and voila! The meal planned for four now feeds eight. Still look a little meagre? Set the table with the good china and light some candles!
This was important knowledge when I lived near the airport in Manila and never knew who might unexpectedly show up. In more recent years, it was a great help when the eight students coming to our little Chinese apartment turned into 12 or 16. They particularly loved the little votive candles that dressed up the IKEA plastic dishes and mismatched flatware.
2. Beds are optional.
Our family home was a small, three-bedroom house, but if there was an unexpected need for more beds, kids got a pile of blankets on our parents’ floor. Many mornings I came down to find someone asleep on the couch. It might be a battered wife who left home in the middle of the night to seek refuge, or it might be a well-known theologian colleague of my dad’s who got stuck in the snow and couldn’t continue his trip.
I learned that the number of beds did not limit the number of people who could spend the night.
I drew on that lesson when my Filipina neighbor showed up at 3 a.m. saying, “My husband’s on a drunk rampage. Can I sleep on your couch?” Or that night when severe weather kept a whole team of short-term workers from flying out, and I scrounged every sheet, blanket, and pillow we owned to bed them all down.
3. Bad mornings can be cured with a cup of hot coffee and two aspirin.
Today it would be ibuprofen, but back then it was aspirin. My mom was a great believer in getting up and getting going. If you were genuinely sick (fever, vomiting, etc.), you got great care but if you (or she) were just having a bad morning, it could be remedied.
I have found this principle to work in any country, any climate, and any situation. I now carry Starbucks Via packets and a small bag of ibuprofen in my backpack for those mornings when the night was far too short.
Malingering gets little accomplished.
4. Laugh at yourself.
One time, as my mother was wrapping up her message at a large women’s conference, I saw her slip beginning to droop. I tried to get her attention, but she was intent on the Word and didn’t see me. When she turned to leave the pulpit, her slip dropped all the way to the floor. The audience drew a collective breath. She stooped over, picked it up in a ball, and burst out laughing—and so did all the women. To this day, I occasionally run into a woman who says, “I was there that time your mom lost her slip!” Laughing at ourselves gives everyone else the permission to laugh with us and makes us human.
Laughter is especially important when culture and language make us the butt of the joke.
5. You WILL offend your co-workers, so be the first to say “I’m sorry.”
I have many memories of my mom heading out the door with the words, “I’ve offended someone, and I need to go make it right.” She was an outspoken, forceful person, and she knew it. But she also knew that keeping peace with co-workers was a high priority. She might have been 100% right, but going to “eat humble pie” and say she was sorry usually defused the tension and ministry went forward. This lesson is the one I hate the most, but it has saved many relationships.
6. Age is no excuse to stop ministering.
Age takes its toll. Mobility declines. We can’t always do what we once did, but God is able to use even the elderly. At 80, my mom filled in as a principal for a year and salvaged a struggling school. As she moved into her 90s, she spent most of each day in a comfortable chair. Her pastor called it “the Command Center.” Beside her was a stack of books, a Bible, and a phone that rang constantly. Local pastors arrived with lists of issues “that I can’t talk about with anyone else.” She listened, prayed, and offered counsel. Young moms came to pour out their hearts while their kids played on the floor. Once I got a call from her with the query, “Have you ever heard of multiple personality disorder?” I replied that I had and she asked for a crash course. “I’m counseling a woman with this and I need to know more.” Even in her 90s, she was still learning what she needed for ministry.
This week I’m traipsing around a huge Chinese city with a knee brace and a borrowed walking stick. Climbing on and off buses and trains hurts, as do the blocks of walking between meeting with former students and Chinese brothers and sisters in the Lord. There’s coming a day when I won’t be able to do this in person, but I’m not too worried.
Additional Posts
Choosing a Missions Organization: Why SEND International Stands Out “Why should I be a missionary through SEND International?” Jenna, a new missionary in Eastern Europe, shared with us what she appreciates about working with SEND. The highlights for her are: - Devotion to prayer - Diligence in communication - Commitment to development - Intentionality in accountability Prayer “Back in September of 2022, the Lord reconnected me with SEND after I had met them a year prior at the Moody Bible Institute. However, before he would sign me up for anything, my Missions Coach encouraged me to pray. He said something to the effect of, "I know that you've been praying on your own for a long time. But as the Church, we are not called to walk alone. So, you and I won't talk for about a month unless you have questions. I want you to go pray with 5 or 6 others from your church about where God is calling you." That October, more than 10 friends prayed with me and we saw God answer as He directed me to Romania. From February 2024 to November 2025, I had the pleasure of being a part of team meetings in Romania with my SEND colleagues. Our meetings were four hours long, two for prayer and two for business. This has been the minimum for our team. There are also prayer meetings with the local churches we partner with, among smaller groups within our team, of course prayer with many of you across the pond, including those at our US office. The organization was built, has been sustained, and continues to run on prayer. This is my favorite thing about SEND. Communication As I mentioned above, we have a two hour block for business / ministry details in each of our meetings. This provides consistency across our team which works alongside three different churches and in a variety of ministries. It also helps us to communicate about the need for change or growth, alongside what is working well. In addition, my team director also meets with each of us, allowing us to communicate needs, considerations, and prayer requests. I've also enjoyed getting to work with SEND workers outside of my immediate region . We receive emails with the minutes from the Europe leadership team, Friday communications from our international director, and information regarding projects that affect our work among the unreached. In December of 2024, our international director at the time wrote a note to my parents for the first Christmas that I was gone. If nothing else had convinced my mom yet, this did. He took the time to care for me, but also to care well for the parents that were sending me (What it meant to my dad and mom for him to do this well has been one of the greatest ways I've been supported.). I also have some pretty wonderful regional directors. These people have prayed alongside us (while also serving in their own countries of service), they have taken time to come visit and encourage our team, and they have also taken the time to encourage the people in our churches. Development SEND has provided much in the area of development and care (spiritually, physically, mentally, and emotionally). At our regional conference (every three years), there have been medical check ups available, counseling options, and time for connecting with others on the field with similar experience. At our conference last October, I connected with a missionary who served overseas for many years, and is now serving on the administrative side of SEND. She has met with me since then for mentorship and has also invested much of her time recently in preparing a retreat for the singles across Europe. Accountability Over the years I have read and heard amazing stories of how God has worked through missionaries. God has done great things and great things He is still doing! However, people who have committed their lives to the Lord in this way are not “super Christians”. We are still humans with the same struggle against flesh that others have . A major challenge is in being isolated -- living in areas with little to no presence of other believers to sharpen them can cause many difficulties. SEND has been a great resource in this area too. Through my team, I have an accountability partner that I meet with monthly. When my regional director came to visit, he and his wife spent a day with me and asked intentional questions about how I lead, handle conflict, and how I am growing in general as a Christian. In addition, my teammates share their wisdom with me on a regular basis. These things and more have assured me that SEND International is a highly valuable organization and I'm excited to partner with them in service to, for, and with our great God! Interested in being sent by SEND?
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