Can you describe a time when you felt stretched
or questioned your calling?
From Siberian winters and language barriers to pandemic isolation and regional conflicts, our missionaries share deeply personal moments of doubt, spiritual stretching, and questioning their calling.
While serving in challenging contexts abroad, each find renewed purpose and deeper trust in God's sovereignty through these difficult seasons. We asked our missionaries: Can you describe a time when you felt stretched or questioned your calling? Here's what they said...
God has stretched me over and over on the field. I remember the early days in Siberia when the cold wind felt like it was blowing straight through my skull and I wondered what I was doing there. Then came the language learning and how it felt (and still sometimes feels), like I will never be able to truly express my heart and what I believe about God and how He is at work in my life and all around us. Language and cultural barriers can leave you feeling limited, even wondering whether you’re truly making a difference.
I also felt very stretched when I took on various leadership roles. At times it felt like I was trying to oversee too many things and I just couldn’t help all the people I was overseeing across the many time zones of our area and region.
Finally, I felt very stretched and a bit lost when we suddenly left Russia at the beginning of the Russia/Ukraine war. Our family left and we didn’t know where to go, what we would be doing or if we would ever see our dear friends and brothers and sisters in Russia again. Eventually, we moved to Central Asia where the Russian language was still helpful, but we were moving from a majority Buddhist region to a majority Muslim region, from a smaller city to a larger city, from a place with almost no other expats to a place where there was a school for expat workers. I felt lost and questioned what I was doing and how I was really helping God’s plans to move forward. In all of these stretching times,
God has continued to remind me that He is in control, He loves me, and He is working no matter how weak or lost I feel.
In all of this, I have not necessarily questioned my calling. But I was extremely stretched. I knew that life in my home culture isn’t easy, but it felt like if I returned, life would be simpler and more straightforward. I was sure that this work is the purpose God has called me to in this season, but I did wonder about what life might look like if I left.
I arrived to the field full time only a few months before the pandemic started. There was a time while I was locked in my apartment that
I did start to question what I was doing and really question what God was thinking.
I had finally arrived only to be locked in my home. But now I can look back and see the purpose and I was able to learn and grow. I was able to learn to depend fully on God when I can see things clearly and
even when it makes no sense to me. I have to trust Him and His ways.
Feeling stretched or unsure about your calling? That’s okay. It’s normal to have questions or feel uncertain as you follow where God leads. Keep praying, keep trusting, He’s still at work in your story.
You don’t have to figure it out alone. We’re here to walk with you. Explore mission opportunities and chat with a SEND missions coach who gets it.
You don’t have to figure it out alone. We’re here to walk with you. Explore mission opportunities and chat with a SEND missions coach who gets it.
Additional Posts
Choosing a Missions Organization: Why SEND International Stands Out “Why should I be a missionary through SEND International?” Jenna, a new missionary in Eastern Europe, shared with us what she appreciates about working with SEND. The highlights for her are: - Devotion to prayer - Diligence in communication - Commitment to development - Intentionality in accountability Prayer “Back in September of 2022, the Lord reconnected me with SEND after I had met them a year prior at the Moody Bible Institute. However, before he would sign me up for anything, my Missions Coach encouraged me to pray. He said something to the effect of, "I know that you've been praying on your own for a long time. But as the Church, we are not called to walk alone. So, you and I won't talk for about a month unless you have questions. I want you to go pray with 5 or 6 others from your church about where God is calling you." That October, more than 10 friends prayed with me and we saw God answer as He directed me to Romania. From February 2024 to November 2025, I had the pleasure of being a part of team meetings in Romania with my SEND colleagues. Our meetings were four hours long, two for prayer and two for business. This has been the minimum for our team. There are also prayer meetings with the local churches we partner with, among smaller groups within our team, of course prayer with many of you across the pond, including those at our US office. The organization was built, has been sustained, and continues to run on prayer. This is my favorite thing about SEND. Communication As I mentioned above, we have a two hour block for business / ministry details in each of our meetings. This provides consistency across our team which works alongside three different churches and in a variety of ministries. It also helps us to communicate about the need for change or growth, alongside what is working well. In addition, my team director also meets with each of us, allowing us to communicate needs, considerations, and prayer requests. I've also enjoyed getting to work with SEND workers outside of my immediate region . We receive emails with the minutes from the Europe leadership team, Friday communications from our international director, and information regarding projects that affect our work among the unreached. In December of 2024, our international director at the time wrote a note to my parents for the first Christmas that I was gone. If nothing else had convinced my mom yet, this did. He took the time to care for me, but also to care well for the parents that were sending me (What it meant to my dad and mom for him to do this well has been one of the greatest ways I've been supported.). I also have some pretty wonderful regional directors. These people have prayed alongside us (while also serving in their own countries of service), they have taken time to come visit and encourage our team, and they have also taken the time to encourage the people in our churches. Development SEND has provided much in the area of development and care (spiritually, physically, mentally, and emotionally). At our regional conference (every three years), there have been medical check ups available, counseling options, and time for connecting with others on the field with similar experience. At our conference last October, I connected with a missionary who served overseas for many years, and is now serving on the administrative side of SEND. She has met with me since then for mentorship and has also invested much of her time recently in preparing a retreat for the singles across Europe. Accountability Over the years I have read and heard amazing stories of how God has worked through missionaries. God has done great things and great things He is still doing! However, people who have committed their lives to the Lord in this way are not “super Christians”. We are still humans with the same struggle against flesh that others have . A major challenge is in being isolated -- living in areas with little to no presence of other believers to sharpen them can cause many difficulties. SEND has been a great resource in this area too. Through my team, I have an accountability partner that I meet with monthly. When my regional director came to visit, he and his wife spent a day with me and asked intentional questions about how I lead, handle conflict, and how I am growing in general as a Christian. In addition, my teammates share their wisdom with me on a regular basis. These things and more have assured me that SEND International is a highly valuable organization and I'm excited to partner with them in service to, for, and with our great God! Interested in being sent by SEND?
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