How we home serviced
Editor’s note: Ah, May. The school year’s drawing to a close. The summer months beckon. And, for many missionaries, it’s time to pull out the suitcases and dive into home service (a.k.a. furlough, a.k.a. home assignment). Here are some tips and strategies for making the most out of what is most certainly NOT a vacation.
By Josie Oldenburg —
I’ve heard tell that some missionaries raise most of their support from churches, but that is not our family’s story. Though we do enjoy some very generous church support, individuals make up the bulk of our team. Goodness, those folks are so kind to us! On our home services, we eagerly looked forward to connecting with the 80 or so individuals and couples who regularly and sacrificially allowed us to serve in Ukraine.
Over the past 12 years, as our family grew and our ministry roles changed, we employed four distinct approaches to connecting with our supporters. Thankfully, almost all of them lived in one of two areas of California, so putting 20,000 miles on our car in six months also wasn’t our family’s story (but traveling mercies to those of you who ARE living that story).
Here’s what we tried and what we learned. I hope our experiences might spark some ideas — for both supporters and missionaries — that will help you connect with one another!
First home service
Family:
Just hubby and me, pregnant with our first.
Length:
Five months
The challenge:
Since it was our first time back, we didn’t know what to expect and arrived without a strategy for seeing our supporters or managing our budget.
Approach:
Meet people in restaurants.
Pluses:
We got to eat all our favorite foods that we’d been pining for during our first two years in Ukraine.
Minuses:
Sometimes we paid, sometimes our supporters paid — either way, it was expensive. To give people a glimpse of our life in Ukraine, we hauled around a photo album and tried to look at it without knocking over water cups or sticking it in the ketchup. Conversations felt rushed, especially once the bill arrived. Eating out two times a day grew old. And we gained so.much.weight. Yes, I was pregnant, but the baby weighed 6 pounds and I gained 60.
Would I recommend this approach?
Nope. Too rushed, too impersonal, too unhealthy, too expensive.
Second home service
Family:
Hubby, me and first son, age 2
Length:
Ten months
The challenge:
Avoid restaurants; focus on relationships.
Approach:
Invite couples or families, one at a time, over to our rental house for Ukrainian food.
Pluses:
This approach felt so personal. We could sit around the table and talk as long as we liked. We hung a big bulletin board in our dining nook and covered it with pictures from Ukraine, which sparked discussion and made it easy to give people a glimpse of our lives there. For the few folks who couldn’t make it to our rental house, we were able to deliver a home-cooked Ukrainian meal to them.
Minuses:
To keep the food prep simple, I cooked the same meal over and over ( borscht
and stuffed cabbage). Stuffed cabbage had been our very favorite Ukrainian food — but after this home service, it was a good year before either of us could stomach it again! This approach also proved logistically challenging; it was a lot of meetings to schedule.
Would I recommend this approach?
Yes! But I’d vary the menu and would start setting up the schedule long before we landed in the States. People’s schedules fill up, so I’d try to get meetings on the calendar a couple of months in advance.
Third home service
Family:
Hubby, me and two sons, ages 7 and 3
Length:
Four months
The challenge:
Tight time frame and young children.
Approach:
Invite people, in groups of 6-8 adults, to our rental condo for Ukrainian food (but NOT stuffed cabbage).
Pluses:
As our kids started attending national school in Ukraine, our home services became limited to the summer months, which meant we had to find a way to see people more efficiently. This approach met that need. We tried to invite people who we knew had some kind of natural connection (all were widows, or all attended the same Sunday school class), so the conversation always proved interesting. We made blini
and served them with a variety of fillings, letting people build their own to suit their tastes. (No stuffed cabbage was served.) By this point, we’d also learned to devote one suitcase to goodies — special napkins and interesting candies — that made each meal feel unique without requiring a lot of effort.
Minuses:
This approach suited our extrovert child very well — so well that it was hard to get some grownup conversation in without him around. But it proved very overwhelming for our introvert child. Much screen time ensued. Also, while this felt more personal than the restaurant approach, it definitely didn’t feel as relational as the one-family-at-a-time approach.
Would I recommend this approach?
Yes, especially for a short home service.
Fourth home service
Family:
Hubby, me and three sons, ages 9 and 5 and 1
Length:
Six weeks
The big challenge:
Ridiculously tight time frame and even more young children. Also, we realized that we were giving our families short shrift when we were back in the States, so we wanted to find ways to prioritize time with them, too.
Approach:
Offer three open houses; send out a mass invite to all our supporters.
Pluses:
Given the brevity of this home service, we needed to see as many people as possible as quickly as possible. Open houses proved extremely efficient. We put together one presentation and repeated it three times, on different days of the week so that (hopefully) at least one date would work for everyone who wanted to attend. We put a lot of thought into what we said, rather than just chatting with folks and letting the conversation determine what we shared. And — a big plus for our kids — the boys didn’t have to sit through night after night of dinners with people they barely knew, hearing stories they’d already heard over and over and over. This also freed up time to spend with family. (We also got the stomach flu for a week. Only the grandparents would hang out with germ-ridden us, so we ended up spending lots of time together!)
Minuses:
Very impersonal. We didn’t even get a chance to talk with everyone who came to the open houses, much less have a meandering conversation about life. It was hard to know how many people to expect at each event, which made planning and food prep challenging. I get social anxiety in big groups and worry that I’ll forget the names of people I’ve known for 20 years, so I always felt really tense beforehand. Also, formal presentations don’t attract young families. As a mom of three, I completely understand, and we tried to offset this issue by still meeting individually with families with kids. We kept those gatherings super casual — just picked up pizza or bagels and hung out in a local park.
Would I recommend this approach? Not really. Given our time frame and the ages of our kids, it was the right choice for us in that season — but six weeks just wasn’t long enough to connect with lots of people in a meaningful way. (Also, I never recommend the stomach flu.) I definitely recommend longer than six weeks if at all possible.
Additional Posts
Choosing a Missions Organization: Why SEND International Stands Out “Why should I be a missionary through SEND International?” Jenna, a new missionary in Eastern Europe, shared with us what she appreciates about working with SEND. The highlights for her are: - Devotion to prayer - Diligence in communication - Commitment to development - Intentionality in accountability Prayer “Back in September of 2022, the Lord reconnected me with SEND after I had met them a year prior at the Moody Bible Institute. However, before he would sign me up for anything, my Missions Coach encouraged me to pray. He said something to the effect of, "I know that you've been praying on your own for a long time. But as the Church, we are not called to walk alone. So, you and I won't talk for about a month unless you have questions. I want you to go pray with 5 or 6 others from your church about where God is calling you." That October, more than 10 friends prayed with me and we saw God answer as He directed me to Romania. From February 2024 to November 2025, I had the pleasure of being a part of team meetings in Romania with my SEND colleagues. Our meetings were four hours long, two for prayer and two for business. This has been the minimum for our team. There are also prayer meetings with the local churches we partner with, among smaller groups within our team, of course prayer with many of you across the pond, including those at our US office. The organization was built, has been sustained, and continues to run on prayer. This is my favorite thing about SEND. Communication As I mentioned above, we have a two hour block for business / ministry details in each of our meetings. This provides consistency across our team which works alongside three different churches and in a variety of ministries. It also helps us to communicate about the need for change or growth, alongside what is working well. In addition, my team director also meets with each of us, allowing us to communicate needs, considerations, and prayer requests. I've also enjoyed getting to work with SEND workers outside of my immediate region . We receive emails with the minutes from the Europe leadership team, Friday communications from our international director, and information regarding projects that affect our work among the unreached. In December of 2024, our international director at the time wrote a note to my parents for the first Christmas that I was gone. If nothing else had convinced my mom yet, this did. He took the time to care for me, but also to care well for the parents that were sending me (What it meant to my dad and mom for him to do this well has been one of the greatest ways I've been supported.). I also have some pretty wonderful regional directors. These people have prayed alongside us (while also serving in their own countries of service), they have taken time to come visit and encourage our team, and they have also taken the time to encourage the people in our churches. Development SEND has provided much in the area of development and care (spiritually, physically, mentally, and emotionally). At our regional conference (every three years), there have been medical check ups available, counseling options, and time for connecting with others on the field with similar experience. At our conference last October, I connected with a missionary who served overseas for many years, and is now serving on the administrative side of SEND. She has met with me since then for mentorship and has also invested much of her time recently in preparing a retreat for the singles across Europe. Accountability Over the years I have read and heard amazing stories of how God has worked through missionaries. God has done great things and great things He is still doing! However, people who have committed their lives to the Lord in this way are not “super Christians”. We are still humans with the same struggle against flesh that others have . A major challenge is in being isolated -- living in areas with little to no presence of other believers to sharpen them can cause many difficulties. SEND has been a great resource in this area too. Through my team, I have an accountability partner that I meet with monthly. When my regional director came to visit, he and his wife spent a day with me and asked intentional questions about how I lead, handle conflict, and how I am growing in general as a Christian. In addition, my teammates share their wisdom with me on a regular basis. These things and more have assured me that SEND International is a highly valuable organization and I'm excited to partner with them in service to, for, and with our great God! Interested in being sent by SEND?
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